Myths About Mentoring: How to Take Your Mentoring Program from Good to Great

You've probably heard of, read about or been part of a mentoring relationship during your career. It's widely known that mentoring is a powerful tool for personal and professional growth. However, there are still many myths about mentoring, especially for women. I want to highlight some of the myths about mentoring and show you how to take your corporate mentoring program from good to great - especially for women.

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Get a Mentor

I frequently hear women being advised to "get a mentor" as a solution to advancing their careers. Additionally, many organisations offer mentoring programs to help address the gender imbalance in leadership roles. However, this approach alone is not the answer. Women receive more mentoring than their male peers yet still face obstacles to promotion, and we still see the global leadership gender gap yawning widely. Successful corporate (strategic) mentoring programs for women:

·     Are grounded in the leadership development needs of the team member and the organisation's talent management goals.

·     Are specifically designed to address the talent management problem/opportunity.

·     Do not assume that all executives are naturally good mentors.

·     Do not assume all mentors have the skills and knowledge to offer strategic mentoring.

·     Provide training and support about strategic mentoring to mentors and mentees throughout the program.

·     Address the critical skill sets that women must gain to be considered for advancement.

·     Address gender dynamics and mentors' mindsets about women in leadership.

·     Create opportunities for career sponsorship of women.

Women are over-mentored and under-sponsored, but mentoring, done right, can be a powerful career advancement tool for people of all genders. This means that individuals seeking a mentor and those in organisations running corporate mentoring programs (especially those for women) need to be on the lookout for the myths about mentoring so they can design their individual and collective mentoring experiences to have an impact.

6 Myths About Mentoring

Myth: A mentor chooses me.

Reality: While it is true that mentors often take the initiative to guide and support someone, it's not exclusively their responsibility to select a mentee. Nor should it be the sole responsibility of the organisation to match mentors with mentees. Mentees should proactively seek a mentor based on their goals, interests, and development needs. Mentoring relationships can be initiated from both sides, and proactive mentees often benefit just as much as those chosen by mentors.

Myth: A long-term mentoring relationship is based on great 'chemistry.'

Reality: While a long-term and close mentoring relationship can certainly be beneficial, not all successful mentoring interactions are necessarily built on an extensive time commitment or deep personal connection. Short-term or occasional mentoring interactions can provide valuable insights and guidance to the mentee. The focus should be on the development needs of the team member and the talent management goals of the organisation so that the quality of the mentoring guidance becomes the measure of success, not the chemistry in or the length of the mentor/mentee relationship.

Myth: My boss is my mentor.

Reality: Although a manager can offer mentorship to their employees, their primary role is to develop the team member, manage their performance and align their activities with the strategic and financial goals of the organisation. A manager cannot necessarily offer 'outside independent views to the mentee, and the mentee should be seeking to be guided by others in their professional network or outside their workplace.

Myth: Mentoring is suitable for addressing underperformance.

Reality: Mentoring is not a substitute for addressing poor performance or disciplinary issues. It is a development-focused relationship aimed at helping individuals enhance their skills, gain insights, and achieve their goals, and organisations meet their talent management goals. If a team member is underperforming, the manager must instigate other measures such as performance improvement plans, additional training, or changes in job responsibilities.

Myth:  I should always be mentored by someone older or more senior than me.

Reality: Effective mentoring is independent of the mentor being older or more senior than the mentee. What matters most is the mentor's experience, expertise, and ability to support the mentee in their specific areas of growth and development. Reverse mentoring relationships and programs are a great example. Some CEOs and executives become mentees so they can stay updated with and abreast of workplace culture, emerging technology and the needs of customers in similar age or career stages as their(more junior) mentor. Peer-to-peer mentoring is also beneficial for onboarding new hires, so they get up to speed with their role, the team and the organisation and feel supported.

Myth: Mentoring will result in a promotion (of the mentee).

Reality: While mentoring can undoubtedly contribute to a mentee's professional growth and skill development, it is not a guarantee for promotion. Being chosen for a corporate mentoring program is also not a guarantee of promotion! The mentee's career success depends on their proven and perceived skills and potential. A strategic mentor may become a sponsor of the mentee. However, other factors, such as performance, organisational opportunities, and market conditions, will impact mentee promotability.

There are plenty of good mentoring programs and methods around. But I'll keep advocating strongly for the design of GREAT strategic mentoring programs that will optimise team members' potential, motivation, and drive, especially when those team members are women.

For more about how to design a strategic mentoring program for women, please read Make the Most of Mentoring by Susan L. Colantuono and then talk to me!

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